I haven't been ignoring my blog... I just couldn't bear to write.
On August 24th at approx. 4:50 PM, I lost Monty, my BigDog. After almost a year of fighting lymphoma, he'd stopped responding to all drugs & measures. He stopped coming when I called him. He struggled to get up & down the stairs to go outside.
On the 22nd, I took Monty to see his oncologist. Yes, dogs have oncologists. He gave Monty "maybe 2 weeks." There was nothing we could do. By that Friday, Monty was a very sick dog. I made an appointment to see Monty's American doctor & we euthanized that Friday. I couldn't watch him suffer anymore... I couldn't watch him die right in front of me.
This all happened 2 weeks ago... & I am still a mess about it. I keep trying to go out for long runs, but all I want to do is lay around on the couch & cry. I can manage the weekdays because I've got a job. But when there's too much free time, I get lost in the depression. I'm a mess & I know it. I keep hoping it'll get better.